I’m that awkward friend that has “stopped drinking.”
When I use the term “stopped drinking” I mean I used to drink, and I really loved it, but for the good of myself and those around me, I chose to stop. It does not mean is that I was a crazy lush who started the morning with half a bottle of Jack in my coffee. I was still in enough control to make the decision to stop. It also does not mean that I wanted to, but that it was necessary.
If you were to spend much time with me you would know I have this funny sarcasm that intensifies and gets kind of hilarious when combined with alcohol. I’ve never been one to hold my tongue, or not speak my mind, but when I would drink it was like magic. I didn’t get mean and I didn’t get sappy. I just cared even less what people thought about me and laughed at it. I also had a very long history with alcohol and we were very comfortable together.
After my third son was born, I had a pretty rough bought with depression. It lasted a lot longer than it had with my second son. It was a lot deeper and darker, but the alcohol made it better. The worries seemed not as heavy and all of life’s other issues would go on hold when I drank. I was able to block out all the insecurities, all the uncertainties and all the guilt when I drank. I was happy when I drank.
I usually drank on the weekends with friends and neighbors. I would have a drink or two when we went to dinner. I especially loved a super cold beer [Read more…]