I’m a little better today. SO MUCH better than I was in Monday’s post. I’ve given myself the chance to take that breath that I needed. Really sucks to be where we are. But it is what it is.
I was telling my friend, Kelly, yesterday that coming to terms with the fact that everyone dies is still much bigger than I can process at this point. She agreed. But the simple fact is that from the moment we are born we start dying.
The reality of knowing loved ones are not going to live forever is not a new process for us. But we do want to avoid it, again, as long as possible. The fact remains that none of us are going to live forever.
So, we pick up our pieces off the floor. We brush off the dust and straighten our crowns. We take a deep breath, look at what has to happen next and step off into it.
First, we need to make sure that her recovery continues to go well. And get her back to as healthy as we can. The doctors are all very pleased with her progress. They have said a typical patient is not as far along as she is. She still has her spirit!
Yesterday she took some steps, stood alone and sat in a chair for a while. She is experiencing some pain, but hey, they cut her guts out! The surgery was laparoscopic so she has one incision in the center of her belly about three inches long. She also has six 1-inch incisions around her belly.
Next will be to treat the cancer that is on her liver. Her liver is functioning well and we must make sure that continues. We are looking at diet and supplements already.
And we’ll look at her bucket list. We already know that she’s been to 47 states and wants to make the full 50. So it looks like a trip to Alaska and Montana and North Dakota are in our near future.
The bucket list is an interesting thing. Why do we have them? Why don’t we just do that stuff? I guess the really fortunate people are those that have a bucket list that is always changing. The people who are constantly marking things off and putting new things on.
This experience is reconfirming my thinking about things like that. I have thought for years that Mark doesn’t take enough vacations with me and the kids. Truth is we haven’t had near enough family vacations. But everyday when Facebook brings up my “Memories” there are pictures of trips with mom and me and my boys.
Just since Daddy died we have been to Gulf Shores, Galveston a few times, South Padre, Colorado, San Antonio and done hundreds of things together locally. I love that she gets it. I love that she understands quality time and making memories. And I love that she has shared that with me and my boys.
As for now, the Lord ain’t finished yet. He will get us through this. Wherever we are a year, three years or five years from now, we will be standing with Him by our sides, knowing whatever happens next is HIS will.